This is me

I think the Americans are dumb; Fancy calling their own game football when it uses less 'feet' than the actual football. So much that the real football has turned soccer. I mean, how can this be?! The fake took away the name of the original. Ridiculous! Worse of all, American football is evolved from the Brit version (Well, USA was a colonized state- talk about democracy). Here's the picture: Football to rugby to American Football. Ah...i get it...more people play football than american football. So please stop calling it soccer. Oh no, it's not confusing. Maybe they should name American football soccer.

Finally, after a week of torture, i was able to play football again. Yay. Back to form as i scored 5 goals straight. One of them is a back flip than caught out the keeper. Ah...i'm genius. Maybe i should really look for a career some day soon. Oh...then i'm injured. I've been carrying this injury since last week, worsened yesterday through the 7 km run. Ah...Didn't improve after the game. It seems like a groin injury, but i don't really know what is it. The pain comes from in between the muscles and the bones, and produce this flaming 'sensation'. Argh..i need to recover soon.

I guess i finally have something to write. It's been ages since i could properly think. Must be the results, must be pw. Or perhaps it's running that got me flying. Aaaa...Still can't believe i can't catch up with those cross-country runners...gotta start training man.

While i was running, i thought of this: I love Outram. But it seems that this love is just enough, not too much, neither too little. Perhaps that's the best way to treasure something. Loving enough that i don't mind not going back (hah..more like i can). I somehow realised i've enjoyed enough, and really should be up there with those creme. With all due respect, i guess i've deproved much in Outram. Yea, more is it my neglection than the schools fault. To go through all 4 years playing is just amazing. The purest of delight.

Spent the previous ten minutes surfing friendster. That tool's kinda cool ehhz? But somehow, it doesn't really help makes new friend. More like re-uniting with old pals. Hah...old pals. Primary school mates, people that i've seldom talk to. But yea, re-uniting. Shouldn't dwell on this man...gotta move on.

Need to wake up early tmr morning to see amanda receive colour awards. One of those real runners. Running has been their lives and will be for a long time i guess. Next year's my last ever year to run in the nationals. Always my favourite event. Got to say i'll retire after that. Meantime, TRAIN HARD.

Weather's perfect now. Red sky, cooling shower. Best for sleeping. Good night.

I just realised exam's finally over. For now at least. Bad news is: MY COMPUTER IS INFECTED! screw that! Hope that all the memory will not be wiped out. 500over mp3s mind you.

It's been so much football since the end of exam. Television, computer and the 'real experience'. BUT..got to say i'm a little rusty. Touches were bad, very bad. Couldn't even make any proper passes. So frustrated that i almost lost it. Lucky i didn't lash out on anybody, if not i would definitely look like some sort of loser.

Got to return to school tmr. Terrible thought. So much that i love cj, i never liked going to school. Oh yes, exam's over u can play. Nah...there's project work, mother tongue 'ao' level and those pestering post-exam activities. Yes, for those efforts, we should all give lots of credit to these pe teachers. But it's amazing how they do not ask the students what they want. Gosh, how can they end these activities at six!? Yes, certain students might enjoy, but it doesn't guarantee none will complain. Yes, it aims to build team spirit, but there's so many other ways...Aaaa...maybe it'll turn out good...i shall stop whining.

Ok, i'm just frustrated. About everything i guess. Let's hope it'll turn better soon.

I'm looking forward for the weekends already...hahaha...need to play socccerrrr.....

Have you ever realised that there were moments when u felt hopeful for a second, yet the opposite the next? It's really amazing how your mind can play tricks on you. I mean, i don't blame the situation, but sometimes, optimism seems to really bugs.

I don't know if i'm being jealous or what, but hey, nothing's mine yet! Ok, yes, you can be jealous over something that others have. Ok, i've never been able to be materialistic in my whole life, can't afford to be one. But this time it's just strange. I mean of course you can't compare a thing and a person, but i just feel awkward about this.

So i've been wondering, what if I did something else during Secondary 2? What if i was able to talk brilliantly? What if i was not shy? What ifs. Yes what ifs. It's definitely frustrating to realise there were so many what ifs in my life. I mean yes, even the slightest flutter of a butterfly would have result in anything in the future. But i could have been a better person now, wouldn't i? I would have been enjoying now.

It's not that i do not like my life. But sometimes, it's really painful to see those stupid blunders. I mean really stupid blunders. Worse, i have never understood any solutions to these problems. Perhaps i am really stupidly gay. Or even a gay is braver than me; he dares to follow his dream. My mental timidity is really killing me!

Sigh

Finally watched Wimbledon today. Kirsten Dunst was rather hot, but always shadowed by her bibotism. Came to think about something: If really one day i have to choose between football and love, which one will i choose? Think about it, football is the love of my life. So is she.

How much do i like her? So much that i've never considered her weaker points. So much that she appears in my dream every night(they're dry ..!.. ). It's amazing. Gosh.

Sigh

I will always remember that day
It started off in a beautiful way

That morning was just beautiful
And that gave me some clue
It would have been some imagination
Imagination turned out so true

I looked out of the window
Detected the slightest shade of shadow
Then i saw her sister
Walking strangely- slow

I followed my father to the parade square
And found lots of people there
It was a healthy lifestyle campaign
Which allowed the people to enjoy the air

Then came a running competition
I came in first with exaltation
There wasn't any pirze to be won
Yet it did not stop my elation

I was absolutely delighted to see her
Which was right after my return from a shower
My heart throbed rapidly
After the vivid sight over my shoulder

She was the prettiest girl i've seen
Something Britney Spears would never win
Her eyes were always sparkling
Such beauty lasted down till her shin

A simple 'hi' would have sparked my day
But all these seems too 'one-way'
So i went home very disappointed
And there was nothing much to say

That was the first time i saw her
I've made this poem for this gorgeous 'ger'
Though it doesn't have a happy ending
This was enough for me to cheer

Hey hey...what's up? the sky...couldn't get any funnier...aaa...Hooked onto studying lately; not that i wanted, but i need to do those papers. It's 3 papers left. The next two seems harder than anything i've ever done...and still see myself wasting time here. De-stress perhaps...

So, i've logged on to blogspot.com, and hey! My blog's named 'This is me'. HAh...how innovative. Just can't think of anything better, guess i need to play my pc games less(but I'm going to get sims2 soon...aaa...). So i scrolled down the page and never stopped laughing...ahhh...Spastic. I don't know what had gotten into me to submit such stupid postings; Maybe i'm genuinely DUMB. No..err..REALLY STUPID. It's just hard to control ehhz? Something about hormones.

Oh yea...one other reason i blogged today is preventing the server from screwing my out. I think i'm little paranoid, but i don't seem to be able to start doing math. Gotta stay awake this whole night. Not prepared to fail math. Math my strength you know? Not doing well's like an illeterate enjoying any blogs. Ok...i shall stop boasting...i need to get down and do something before the worst really happens.

I really can't wait for football this weekend. Have been dreaming to put on those boots and just feeeelll the balll. Sounds kinky. Ah...don't be sick..football's a healthy living lifestlye. I saw Cristiano Ronaldo took on all the full backs possible. I saw Figo's amazing touches. I saw Ronaldinho's movements. I saw myself in front of the mac donalds table daydreaming. WAKE UP!

hahaha...the lamest issue yet. Lamest for now. Lame...lame...lame...(tune to dream dream dream). IS THIS ME? a little bit i guess...oh...yea..quite a lot.